Bullish Behaviour

Bullish Behaviour

Do you ever get those moments when you think to yourself, 'perhaps I shouldn't have done that'? Or 'that was a bit risky', but life wouldn't be as exciting if I wouldn't have done it? Or even 'I wasn't expecting that', but if it wouldn't have happened, I would be none the wiser now. I believe that in these moments of reflection, there is always something to learn.

I had one of those moments today when I took my 3 girls and my brother's German Shepherd dog to the local playground where my parents live in Wales. After about 10 minutes of running around, enjoying ourselves and getting the dog to play fetch, my 11 year old said she was bored!  Oh my goodness, we were only half way through the girls' summer holidays and my eldest was already complaining that she was bored.

"I know let's take the dog for a walk across the fields, that will be exciting," I exclaimed. "We can walk across the Monkey Bridge and play in the river like I used to as a child."

My 9 year old and 5 year old seemed excited by this prospect. My 11 year old sulkily dragged herself along, looking as though this may have been marginally better than the playground.

We started off well. As we approached the narrow, wooden, single track bridge, my 5 year old eyes lit up.

"This is exciting Mummy," she confirmed, with the vibrancy of a child who was about to go on an amazing fair ride.

The dog and girls played in the river and had lots of fun.  Not content to stay in one place for too long, I encouraged my children to follow the public footpaths along the fields, so we could enjoy some of the Welsh countryside. We put the dog back on the lead, walked through a field with sheep. They were fortunately grazing at the top end (my brother's dog pulls like a cart horse and I knew that she and I would be up the top end of the field in no time at all if she felt like it). To my relief, the next field was clear of animals. We admired a herd of cows. They were on the other side of the river and noted how different they looked to the Bali cows, which look more like bambis compared to the thick set Welsh cows. As we continued to walk along the edge of the field, the cows in the other fields were on the move and heading in the direction of the river. Suddenly and much to my surprise these cows were not only able to cross the river, they entered the same field as us.

"Mummy why are all those cows coming into the same field as us?" my eldest asked.

"We'll be ok," I re-assured my daughters, "They're only female milking cows." The size of their udders and swaying stomachs looked big enough to feed the whole of Wales.

The girls wanted to know how I knew they were female cows. While thinking that schools should explain this and reluctantly giving a mini biology lesson, I noticed that the smaller cows didn't have udders and were bullocks! I was becoming a little more alarmed, especially when one big black cow started to walk in our direction and gave us an angry look that instantly reminded me of an old woman from my childhood days who had a scowl that would scare off a vampire. Perhaps she had come back to haunt me.

"Just stay still," I advised my girls. "At least there isn't a bull in the field." I cheerily noted.

It was one of those moments where I was outwardly pretending to be calm and was starting to panic underneath. The actor Michael Caine sums up this feeling well:

"Be like a duck. Calm on the surface, but always paddling like the dickens underneath."


We waited patiently and considered going back in the direction we came from, but fortunately for us, the black cow lost interest and moved on up the field with the other cows. Finally, the long trail of at least 30 cows seemed to come to an end, when out from the river and the trees, sauntered the biggest, fattest bull I have ever seen. He was a beautiful, blonde colour and swaggered stiffly as though he had fathered too many calves.

"Mummy, why hasn't that cow got udders?" the girls asked.

"That's because it isn't a cow," I hesitated. "It's a bull .......stand very still so that he doesn't see us."

"But Mummy, you're wearing a red top!" My 9 year old clearly pointed out to me.

As I looked down at my top, not only was it bright red, it had thick red and white horizontal stripes that were enough to give a bull migraine. I was the proverbial red rag to a bull and didn't feel in the mood to play matador. I froze to the spot hoping he wouldn't notice us, inspite of holding a fidgeting dog who happened to be blissfully sniffing the bushes on her extended, long lead. Luckily for us he was more interested in the females ahead of him and he stiffly followed them up the steep field like a bull's version of John Wayne.

The girls and I gingerly walked along the edge of the field. The girls, who were wearing three quarter length trousers, complained bitterly about the stinging nettles and I was quick to inform them that a nettle rash was far less painful than mosquito bites that itch and blister for days afterwards.  At last, we climbed the gate to the field and made it to safety along a country lane.

"Can we go to a bar now," my 9 year old piped up, as if there would miraculously be a bar in the middle of the Welsh countryside!

"We're in Wales now, not Bali," I exclaimed. "You don't get bars in the middle of the fields!"

For my daughters, the perils of the Welsh countryside seem to exceed the perils of the poisonous snakes and pesky mosquitoes in the tropics! I'm glad we went on our Monkey Bridge walk, even though it unexpectedly required some bullish behaviour. As Michael Caine says:-

"I started with the firm conviction that when I came to the end, I wanted to be regretting the things that I had done, not the things I hadn't."

What are you glad you have done, even though it may have required some bullish behaviour or what can you do more of so there are no regrets?

For more information about our one to one coaching or team training contact NoLimits by clicking on the link on this blog page.

Janet

Taking Risks

Taking Risks


What risks have you taken in your life? Do you like to take risks or do you prefer stay in your comfort zone? How much adventure do you have in your life? Do you have enough adventure or would you like to have more?

Last week, I met up with two ex-work colleagues / good friends in London. We used to work for the same company in Central London, Diageo Plc, the world's leading premium drinks company. Eleven years on, my one friend still works for Diageo, she has excelled in her career and now heads a global function. My other friend used to be my boss and left Diageo about the same time as me. She has written and authored a book, is in the process of publishing her second book and works as a Director for a Human Resources Consulting Company. My friends have done well for themselves and yet they look at me as the daring one and wish they could take risks like me!

"You have taken such a risk, we could have never done that. You are so brave," my friends both agreed.

I presumed they meant I was brave because of moving my family to one country and running our talent search and development company, NoLimits, in another country.

"Either brave or completely crazy." I sighed thinking of the challenges I had encountered by moving to Bali.

After meeting up with my friends, I couldn't help but wonder where I would be now if I would have carried on working and living in London. I would have been very comfortable no doubt, but I know I would be wondering what else was out there and craving for some adventure as this is something that I personally value. As I pondered to myself, I decided to pop into Hatchard's, along Piccadilly, the oldest surviving bookshop in London that dates back to 1797. A quote which was typed in bold, on a laminated sheet of A4 paper and perched on top of a number of books, quickly re-affirmed how I like to live life and why I have taken a risk:-

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." Helen Keller (1880-1968)

Helen Keller was the first deaf and blind person to gain a Bachelor of Arts degree. She was an American author, political activist, speaker and lecturer. Her triumphs over adversity led her to become a role model to millions of people..

The risks we take don't have to involve doing something drastic. They can involve doing something different, especially if we feel we want to do something but don't have the courage.

"Man cannot discover new oceans, unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore." Andre Gide (1869-1951) 

It's never too late to take risks, no matter how large or small and live life as a daring adventure. It's never too late to discover new oceans.



Find out more how NoLimits helps individuals and companies overcome limits and take risks that are in line with personal and organisational values.

Janet

Who Talks to Me Inside?

Who talks to Me Inside?

Have you noticed an internal voice that talks to you?  Sometimes it can seem incessant, it always provides an internal commentary on everything you do and think. Sometimes it can help you and other times it can get in the way. It judges for you, whether you feel like it or not. You hear it speaking to you whether you want it or not and that little voice inside you has been talking to you for years.

I was surprised to be asked by my five year old daughter,

"Mummy, who is that who talks to me inside?"

"It's you who is talking to yourself. It's your own voice."  I advised her.

My daughter thought about my response for two seconds, looked puzzled that she should tallk to herself inside and then got distracted by her two older sisters. We were on the train, on our way to London to visit our special friends. My internal talk was feeling positive as I love London and my good mood was further lifted by a helpful ticket inspector called Vic, who was the sort of person who could even make a suicidal depressive feel good.

How we talk to ourselves inside will influence our thoughts and beliefs. When my friend, her three daughters, my three daughters and I were on the London Underground, a kind lady gave her seat to us. As we got off the train, I thanked her again for letting us have her seat and she whispered to me in an endearing, 'I could never do that' way, "Well, you are rather a lot!"

Even though we may have seemed like a lot, when we got on with what we intended to do, it worked out well. It may have had its challenges (particularly when we lost one of our daughters in Harrods!) and it may have been hard work (the weather was sweltering as we jumped on and off the London buses and Underground), but we could still enjoy ourselves and make the most of the opportunity.

Use that little voice inside to help you, rather than let it sabotage you.

As Henry Ford says:-

"Whether you believe you can do a thing or not, you're absolutely right."

Take care of what you say to yourself inside.
Janet

Life on the Other Side

Life on the Other Side

Do you ever get moments when you wonder what it would be like to live somewhere else and even do something else?

I have these moments when I return to the UK on holiday. I haven't lived in the UK for over 10 years now and when I did live in the UK, I used to wonder what it would be like to live somewhere else. Now that I live in Asia, I wonder what it would be like to live in Europe again and live in the UK!  Personally, I think we bring the same old baggage with us wherever we live unless we choose to change the baggage. Some things do change though by living somewhere else such as our appreciation, wonder and curiosity.

I was reminded of this last week, when my three daughters and I arrived in England to stay with our friends in Thame, Oxfordshire.  We became the observers of typical family life back in Blighty. Schools haven't yet broken up for the summer holidays in the UK like the international schools, so we could see all the comings and goings of this family of four. It was like being witness to a fire drill operation. There was the early morning rise ready for the children to go to their swimming lessons before school, the packing of lunch boxes, the unpacking of the dishwasher and stacking it back up again with dirty plates, the husband whizzing in and out of the kitchen doing up his tie and grabbing a piece of toast before running out to his car ready for work, the wife running around like a tornado picking up all the relevant things she needed before driving the children to swimming and then back again ready for school, before starting work for her own business.

Like one of the members of the fire crew, I agreed to do my bit and offered to do a supermarket run . What I love about British supermarkets is the choice available. As I walked down the aisles of Waitrose supermarket, I became mesmerised by the sheer quantity, quality and choice of products offered. I was as excited as a child in a sweet shop.

"Can I help you?" a polite and helpful assistant asked.

"I'm really looking for the honey, but can't help being distracted by all these things," I exclaimed, my eyes wide open in amazement, while scanning the range of Cath Kidston mugs, colourful children's baking utensils (you can get little, soft, silicone heart shape moulds in a range of colours that can be used again and again) and pretty egg cups with their own individual bright cosies.

The assistant looked at me perplexed as though she was wondering whether extra terrestrial people do exist.

"I don't live here anymore." I thought I had better explain myself quickly. She still looked a little hesitant.

"We don't have supermarkets like this, where I live,"  I was trying to make myself sound more sensible, but judging by the assistant's silence, this clearly wasn't working.

"I live in Asia ..... Singapore .... well Bali .....," I tried to explain while the assitant led me to the honey.
The assistant smiled politely and showed me the honey. I thanked her profusely for getting me back on track for what I really wanted and we parted ways. I walked down the aisle with the Cath Kidston range and quickly peeked one more time before anybody else asked if I needed assistance and then I determinedly headed straight for the checkout before getting distracted again.

Paying at the checkout made me realise the ease with which you can pay for items in the UK. Instead of counting out over a million Indonesian rupiah in fifty thousand notes as I do in Bali, I could simply use my UK bank card and even get some cash back! How convenient is this?!  Usually I have to kidnap an ATM booth in Bali for at least fifteen minutes, while I attempt to get out a million rupiah (100 US dollars) in 50,000 notes which requires at least twenty attempts of re-enetering my card into the machine!

It does pay to sometimes stop and think about what we do have on our own side:-

"A man travels the world over in search of what he needs and returns home to find it."

George Moore (1852-1933) Irish novelist, short story writer and poet

Appreciate life wherever you are and including on your own side.

Janet